After awakening from a drunken slumber, I walked into the kitchen and saw Bill Cosby's cock inside a cookie jar screaming for some mac daddy love. When I say cookie jar, I mean he was lying naked with his black hairy nipples on the floor.
I couldn't resist shoving Cosby's big black veiny dick into my rectal cavity.
My mom walks into the kitchen and sees this vile scene. I could not help but to shove my profusely sweaty beanbag into her ear cavity. Rather than condemn me to a night in the firey depths of hell, I could see that it aroused her.
She proceeded to rip my pubic hairs out and shove it into the recesses of her vaginal hole. In order to vizualize this scene, you need to understand how deep her fucking vagina is. Let us just say that her bearded clam was comparable to Star Gate.
My mother then had the audacity to tell us to stop what we were doing so she could get ready. For what? I had no idea. I was just pissed the fuck off cause she didn't even have the goddamned courtesy to give me a reach around.
She comes out of her room with a strap on, she was fucked if she thought she would be using that on me, it was fucking bigger than anything I've taken up the ass ever before. I was forced to run out of the house bare assed naked.
I had to fucking run down the highway with semen stains on my ass (they were huge by the way - they were from fucking BILL COSBY) and where my pubes were supposed to be there was just raw skin.
What was I to do but go into church and pray?
Moral of the story - don't go into church balls out and unshowered
P.S. Can anybody bail me out of jail? I only need 500 dollars and I'll pay you back with cocaine and blowjobs.